Blogger's note: I have previously published this post on a different blogsite, so if you recognize the photo at the top, no need to read on (although you are quite welcome to!) Today I had lunch with my 'tribe'- mentioned in the original post. We were discussing what we would do to celebrate our 60th birthdays next year, and I had told them about my blog and they all wanted a link to it. So, this post is dedicated to Susan, Michele, Lyn and Diana- my tribe.
The memories are still raw, over forty years later. Teenage girls can be so cruel- back in 1971, things were different from today. Nobody could send you a nasty text, or share an image online. Then, as they still do now, they practised their particular art by exclusion. The knowing smiles. The vandalized books. The mimicking.
And it hurt.
It’s fair to say that I was very naïve, but I was only thirteen, and if
you can’t be naïve when you are in Year 8 then I don’t know when you can. They
seemed so much more worldly than me. They would include me in their
conversations, and then later disown me. I would leave my desk to collect an
item from the science trolley and come back to find my notebook smeared with
some unidentifiable substance. I was even kicked in the shins.
I wanted to leave.
I was actually pretty popular with my peers. I was elected class
captain, and I’d always got on well with other people. I took my school work
seriously, and at that stage I wasn’t really interested in boys like some of
the other girls whose bodies were much more developed than mine and who spoke
about things I had no experience of.
I was a pretty good runner, good enough to be in a relay team. I loved
the training sessions and the constant practice of the baton changes. I liked being
in a team which included girls of all ages- the Year 12s seemed so grown up,
and they were very kind to we younger ones.
It was an escape.
With Mum’s urging, I hung in there. I made it to the end of Year 8,
found a couple of new friends, and was ready to face Year 9. I was getting
smarter about who I hung around with. As Rebecca Sparrow would say,
I ‘found my tribe’.
But something happened, and its significance wasn’t apparent until it
was athletics season again.
I grew.
In fact, I shot up. I no longer had to stand on tiptoe to see myself in
the bathroom mirror. It was a typical growth spurt for someone my age. I ate as
if there was no tomorrow- in those days I could eat an entire block of Cadbury
chocolate on the train trip home. Of course, the other girls were in various
stages of the same process, and looking back at the school photos you can see
how the back row changed year by year.
The inter-house athletics carnival was the first activity on the
athletics calendar. It was the event when PE teachers started to take note of
performances and times. I still thought of myself as the third fastest in my
age group, so nominated myself for events accordingly. I was looking forward to
the day.
And then, things changed. Diane W, the fastest in my age group, came and
asked me if I’d sub for her in the first division race because she wasn’t
feeling well. ‘Okay,’ I said, thinking this is going to be interesting. I’m
going to be creamed.
The gun fired, and we were off. I felt as if I was flying. I could take
many more strides over 100 metres than the other girls- lots of fast twitch
fibres. I still weighed next to nothing, but my new height had transformed the
biomechanics of my body and I bolted ahead of the others and flashed over the
finishing line first.
I was gobsmacked.
A minute later, Mrs C, always the announcer for school carnivals (why is
that?), spoke over the PA. ‘And that’s a new record for the 14 years 100 metres
by Diane W.’ After all, she was the name on the list of nominees. Diane, bless
her, raced over to me and said, ‘Quick, come with me. I’ll go and explain to
the recording table and to Mrs C that it was you that was running.’
So then everyone knew. A new announcement gave the correction and I
heard my name broadcast across the oval. Was this for real?
Yes, it was. In fact, it was very real. I was the fastest in my age
group. Actually, I was the fastest in all age groups, for the next four years.
I performed well at interschool competitions and in Year 11 and 12 I won the
‘blue ribbon’ event- the 100 metres. I was appointed Athletics Captain.
And guess what? From that day in Year 9, I didn’t care about the bullies
any more. I simply couldn’t give a stuff. Because I had found the thing that I
was good at- really good at. I walked with my shoulders back and my head high.
My ‘tribe’ grew, and over forty years later I regularly have lunch with some of
them. They are the same ‘girls’ now as they were then.
My experience is probably not much different from many teenage girls,
then and now. But the lessons I learned have stayed with me, and I’ve passed
them on to the girls I’ve taught.
- As Rebecca
would say, hang around with the people who bring out the best in you.
- Try
lots of different things- you never know what you might be good at.
- Listen
to your Mum- she’s much wiser than you think.
